Watching Shit Movies So You Don’t Have To


I love movies. I love going to the cinema. But sometimes the movies don’t love me.

Here is a list of some of my viewing experiences over the last year, divided by my opinion of their quality. I’ll link them to their IMDb pages for more info. Some are new, some are old. Some are mainstream, some are more obscure.


The Great…

Mad Max – Fury Road – Refreshing, amazing, out-of-the-box action movie that shows women of all shapes, sizes and ages can kick ass.

The Tree of Life – Not a normal movie. Don’t expect a normal movie. Part meditation, part polarising vignette of toxic masculinity. Let it wash over you. It can be an amazing experience if you can forgive it for not being a normal movie.

If These Walls Could Talk – Troubling, devastating and incredibly important movie about abortion. An all-star cast of amazing women, frighteningly real and still all too relevant today.


The Good…

Star Wars – The Force Awakens – Nice girl-power adventure movie with a few historical actors to appeal to the purists. Rey is the hero we have been waiting for. Looking forward to the next installment.

The Hunting Ground (documentary) – Eye-opening, disturbing expose of the epidemic of rape and rape culture on college campuses in the USA.

Iron-Jawed Angels – Eye-opening and uplifting story of the horrendous treatment a group of women in the USA endured to obtain the right to vote.

Terminator – Genisys – I actually liked this. I liked the characters. I liked how they worked Arnold Schwartznegger’s advancing age into the story. Jai Courtney and Emilia Clarke are adorable. Much better than any of the other cash cows in the franchise that have come out since Judgement Day.

Hot Girls Wanted (documentary) – a distressing, gut-punch of a film from Rashida Jones, telling the story of young girls who attempt to make their fortune in amateur porn. If you still think porn is harmless after watching this, then there is no hope for you.


The Watchable…

Trainwreck – Like every other romantic comedy but with more swearing and dick jokes.

Ricki and The Flash – Cute, fluffy, musical, occasionally cringeworthy, with a dash of age-appropriate eye candy in the form of Rick Springfield.

Magic Mike XXL – A movie about men, by men, for women. Cute road movie with a few glaring ‘nope’ moments. See my extended review of it at The Wild Words.


The Disappointing…

The Piano – Not at all the amazing feminist piece I was expecting. Men behaving badly, women doing what they can with what they have. Harvey Keitel’s exposed backside neither adds nor detracts. His character is still creepy and predatory.

The Virgin Suicides – Meh. I was completely unmoved by this. Not sure if that makes me a bad person. The mother in the story was the only family member without a first name, she was just ‘Mrs Lisbon’. That irks me.


The Terrible…

The Wolf of Wall Street – Three hours of my life I will never get back. Spent all of it wanting to punch Leonardo Di Caprio in the face. What a thoroughly unlikable character.

The Dressmaker – hideous representation of life in small-town Australia. Portrays old people and women as caricatures of evil, while nice young white men are thoroughly pleasant ‘good blokes’ who shit keeps happening to. Watch ‘Shame’ for a more accurate version of what goes on in places like this.

The Diary of a Teenage Girl – claims to be an empowering depiction of emerging female sexuality, is actually a well-crafted normalisation of grown men having sex with young girls. Wrong. Avoid.


Now, I don’t waste time on a movie unless I have a reason to watch it. Whether that is a recommendation, a trailer that piqued my interest, positive reviews or a suggestion based on something else I have watched. And I check the content meticulously. Yet, as you can see, I still end up watching some clangers.

If, based on this list, you know of anything I might like to watch, or at least investigate, please drop me a line. I am also always willing to discuss movies that people disagree with me about, so if your experience of any of these was different, or if it was the same, feel free to say so in the comments.